beachy keen

DSC_0004  remember how last post i complained a lot? there will be no complaining this post.DSC_0023

why?

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because i went to the BEACH! with my FRIENDS!

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and i did a subpar job with the self timer. lol. IMG_5459a few months ago, when it was cold and drab and dark and all i really wanted was to feel the sun on my face, airplane tickets to florida were cheaper than, oh, an uber ride during peak hours probably, so we snagged a few and started counting down the days to last weekend. (we also vowed to get beach ready and quit buying so many tubs of ben n jerry’s…. but, well, whatever feminism tells me that being bikini ready just means putting on a bikini, right? RIGHT!) IMG_5377so we flew to orlando and rented a van.

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jeff drove. eliza took shotgun. it was like mom and dad and the four kids and i was all about it! Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

 a friend told me we needed to go to st. augustine, florida. he was on point. this city is allegedly the oldest civilization in america, and was discovered by ponce de leon 450 years ago. the town is super cute and spanish, the beaches are pristine and the water is WARM! and there were no sharks. (that i knew of.)IMG_5410also, please enjoy my use of filters in this pic to make us look a little less white. is it working? hehhhh

IMG_5416we rented off airbnb and let me just say that i will probably never travel any other way again. we had a huge house at an affordable rate and there were enough beds and sheets and kitchen space and random christian movies that teach good moral values and entranced us. i mean, maybe we watched the sound of music in its entirety over two nights? yes, we are in our twenties and single. i know. i know. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetProcessed with VSCOcam with c1 preset
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the people were really nice. for instance, one lady literally jumped out of her car to take this photo. people were following us around at the grocery store with shopping carts. the people at church told us we definitely needed to move into their ward. (lol)Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

IMG_5446 one day we went to anastasia island and enjoyed the sunny beachIMG_5444 capri suns, FTW! sadly, afterwards i read an article about how unenvironmentally friendly the packaging is. womp womp. sorry, mother earth. sorry, seagulls! Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetthis trip i kinda slacked/ was apathetic towards taking pictures with my food becuase… idk. just keeping you on your toes, people! but we ate great food at the floridian where they put honey in my salad and it was so good i wanted to cry, and gas full service restaurant, where i had portabella mushrooms with parmesan garlic mashed potatoes that could bring grown men to their knees. then we food crawled over to cousteau’s waffle and milkshake bar one night for waffles topped with toasted coconut ice cream and espresso reduction and a million other foodgasmic ingredients. also, the restaurant loved bill murray a la life aquatic, and i was so INTO IT! Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

and then, like a beacon in the night, one night at the end of our food tour we happened upon the hippo, and without thinking i just walked in and ordered an avocado coconut popsicle, and it was the best thing i’ve eaten in months. truly, madly, deeply in love with that one.

and amy got the piña colada, which she deemed wonderful. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

the trees in florida are so swampy feeling. i imagined zombies traipsing out of the forest a la walking dead the whole drive. also, the misty effect is all thanks to getting water in my phone. how artsy. how… technologically uncool. 
IMG_5478and then on our way back to the airport we made a pitstop at the orlando temple, just to say we went. we were all sunburned and miserable and having a hard time walking, but we did it. in and out. that temple is a beaut, ps. IMG_5479 but the best part?? the fact that the fountains kinda misted us. ahhh misters.

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temple selfie! put us in the ensign, church!

and then we hopped on another plane headed northward. PRO TIP don’t fly out of orlando unless you want to be packed on a plane with a lot of children detoxing from disneyworld. oh, the screaming.

see how i didn’t complain there? ;)

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suck it, winter.

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hey summer it is nice to meet you.

um hi. THIS IS A SPRING WRAP UP!

and so continues my attempt to blog.

hey there. remember me? today is the first day of my third semester of nursing school. THIRD! THIRD! THIRD! this means i am over halfway done and i shall be a nurse by december. (fanfare, drums, applause, encores, kissing babies, etc etc etc)

it is safe to say that the last three months were probably most mentally draining and challenging of my life. nursing school is no joke. i would say these memes sum it up quite nicely.

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can i say i’m glad the madness of winter term is over? anyway. contrary to popular belief, i did stuff last semester amidst the crazy. here’s evidence. in fact, more and more i think this blog is just evidence that i do stuff. IMG_1977we ran a half marathon! well, i ran the half, these cooler ladies did the full. it rained the whole time but i PRed and looked like a mess doing it, which is the right way to do things, no?

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there was a lot of snow weirdness that happened this spring. it was incessant. but, sometimes, pretty enough.

one of my favorite nursing school coping mechanisms when i get stressed out is taking really repulsive photos of myself because it is hilarious to look back at when times are all good and dandy. this is me studying, marginally wanting to just end it alllll.

we redid our hole we call an apartment by adding **twinkle lights** and it is still ugly but at least a little bit less… dim? idk. again, just here to document the ridiculous life i live.

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again, snow. eliza and i on our winter trudge. like, LOOK AT THAT SNOW. i believe this was march but idk. i’m really just trying to block it all out and close that chapter of life, LET’S BE HONEST!

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best place to study in the district. i think i’ve said it before. all the hot dads take their babies to the terrace and the conglomerate of them plus the million year old art curators conversing and drinking cheap wine from the gift shop it is really adorable

IMG_4966my study set up. look how organized i am. (lol this lasted one minute) the real star of this photo though is the nalgene bottle that looks like you should be peeing in it and those vanilla mints back there. seriously, best impulse trader joe’s buy. if you like vanilla and mints and happiness, get some.

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Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetcasually passing time in a grocery store, waiting for the bus. this is how we live life.

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetand then i turned 24 and changed my name to emily.

lol just kidding it was actually a joint birthday party and only half the banner fit in the frame but seriously, these are the best friends a girl could have. they planned a party and made me a playlist and somebody brought me a hot pretzel filled with nutella. i mean, honestly.

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Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetand it sufficeth me to say that all the people i really like came.

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetif you’re looking for the key to my heart, it is probably in the bottom of this tableside guac from oyamel.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetthis is hell’s bottom, the trendy barbershop i pass by every day feeling a little spooky at night. this is where i come and gawk at the bearded beauties cutting each other’s hair in shaw.

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preseteating food we actually can’t reasonably afford.

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why i cannot seem to land a boyfriend is lost on me given my affinity for fashion when riding to and from work/school/crossfit.

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more running fun times to check out the cherry blossoms before the crowds took over with their ipads

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the pretzel bakery on capitol hill where you can buy aforementioned pretzels filled with nutella and other delectables. the joy on our faces here is REAL!

flowers outside my school. beauty like this in the face of such stress makes things a little more bearable.

my roommates were twins and they didn’t even know it. also, please take note of the wonderful lighting in this apartment, we are really blessed to be honest. (Lol)

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the views of adams morgan and georgetown respectively on bike rides to and from who knows where.

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hailey had a birthday!!! she is the best and please take note of the multicolored candles because they cost me AN ARM AND A LEG.

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a one year anniversary trip to teddy roosevelt island one morning. folks, i have lived in this district for one whole year, you better believe it!

flower petals but i am pretending it is confetti for getting through another day of school.

big bear cafe patio is open and you can find me there, not ordering anything and stealing the free wifi. hehhhhh

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favorite ivy covered house on 5th street and kolby’s birthday that wasn’t actually a birthday but just an excuse to celebrate something.

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food pics because who do you think i am?? best bagel sandwich from big bear cafe pre-pharmacology final. I NEEDED THIS! I EARNED THIS! I chanted to myself with every single bite. (not a lot of bites did it take, i inhale food)

post-finals celebration dinner at zaytinya. one of the more meh DC meals i’ve had, but good nonetheless. good try, andrés.

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bento box from teaism, which is my new favorite restaurant in dupont. GET THE SALTY OAT COOKIE DON’T ASK QUESTIONS, MAYBE GET TWO.

this is my face on easter after working like fourteen hours at founding farmers or something ridiculous. he is risen! people are getting smashed! IMG_5173this is probably my favorite photo i have ever taken of babies in dc. they ride by in their daycare cars oh so coyly as if to just say, “you can’t sit with us” in true mean girls fashion.

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pretty spring trees! me hating life in my half marathon! tim taking me out to mexican food for dinner at el centro! i’m sick of typing! can you tell?

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pretty golden hour views. empty buses are really creepy. say hello to me and my nursing shoe/leggings combo!

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prettiest trees for spring in ledroit park. and YOURS TRULY WITNESSING BIRTHS! that is right, folks, this is me after watching birth via forceps, i know that you’re JEALOUS!

three idahoans in black puffy coats take new york city.

here we are. new york city!

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we ate pasta at eataly. it was fancy. like, the waiter refused my request to top my pasta with parmesan because it wouldn’t fit the flavor profile, fancy. (not bitter, nope).  Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

eataly, where i want to eat everything. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

washington square park and when harry met sally moments.  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

black coats unite!

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we ran around central park. this is where i don’t tell you about how my dad forgot his workout clothes and we convinced him to wear my mom’s spandex leggings for our jaunt. (hehe)Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

central park just gives us feelings

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zabar’s is cheese heaven. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

after my run i obviously went to levain bakery for their amazing cookies.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

run seven miles, eat seven hundred calories worth of cookie. seems legit. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

adventures on the high line. dad needed a break. this is funny because he is actually kickass at parallel parking. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

we walked across the brooklyn bridge and ate at grimaldi’s.Processed with VSCOcam with b1 preset

we were the only people without a selfie stick. IMG_4858

hi.

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my outfit inspiration for this trip was like jonathan taylor thomas a la tool time. i can’t be held accountable for this. Processed with VSCOcam with b1 preset

pizza like whoa! i don’t know what was more memorable, though… the pizza or the conversation going on behind us. ask me about it sometime.

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when we finished, we walked back to the city in the dark. this is my favorite new york view. Processed with VSCOcam with b5 preset

new york city library! when can i move in?

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i was set on seeing matilda, and thankfully my parents obliged. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

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i did not, however, think about the type of crowd a show like matilda would draw… this photo perfectly encapsulates the experience, aka my 49 year old father plus every single 10 year old on the upper west side accompanied by their mom. rejoice!  dad points for being a good sport. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

matilda was really good. you should totally see it and it will change your ideas about broadway being kind of stupid. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

one day i dragged my parents way north for a bagel at absolute bagel. these are the best bagels. they’re life changing. i would go back to new york just for one of these everything bagels with a sundried tomato shmear.IMG_0050 

speaking of food…  we ate a lot of things. like these pickles from the pickle guys. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetbread and butter for the win!!

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and this knish. and the feelings it brought to me. those jews know what they’re doing.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetProcessed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

china town sesame pancakes and miso soup. good grief this is the cheapest most delicious meal i tell you what! my stupid grin says ALL.

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staten island ferry selfies. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

oh heyyyy m + d!

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lady liberty and lady-hasn’t-washed-her-hair-in-a-week. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

pit stop at strand books. dad wasn’t impressed. WHATEVER. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

a grainy photo that is important because this is mom’s first shake shack experience and she didn’t like it. the shroom burger was still legit though. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

this is my dad eating a hot dog on wall street. totally fit in with the business men.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

one world building. just look at it!

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here’s mom and dad playing mind games in the apartment. they were killing the memory section of the pilot’s test. early onset alzheimer’s, be damned! Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

these two fine folks riding the subway like true new yorkers. moments like this make me proud! i wonder if they felt the same way about teaching me to ride a bike as i did teaching them to use public transportation. my heart is beaming.  Processed with VSCOcam with b1 preset

hey there cityscape! Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

the flat iron. this is the best building in new york. IMG_4856

city bakery in the flat iron district knows their way around a croissant. and a bran muffin. and everything else. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

these snowmen speak unto me. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

the hummus place aka my heaven forever and ever AMEN. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

velvety smooth hummus as far as the eye can see. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

third wheelin and dealin  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

central park aka central tundra.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

do these sunglasses make me look glam or what.Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

the babies of the upper west side have their lives together.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

wafels and dinges! just another manifestation of my life goal to just travel by walking and eating everything i see in the process. mother mary and joseph. these things are good.

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more delicacies for lunch a la a salt and battery. it was an authentic experience right down to the awful british glam pop rock going on in the backgroud. fried fish, i love you IMG_4815

mom was big into greenwich village. “i feel like i’m on sesame street!” indeed. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

i’ve got this thing for walls and taking photos of half my face. just go with it. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

i thought we might run out of things to talk about after a whole week together, but when things got a little slow moving, it was comforting to know that we could always just revisit the conversation of whether these water towers are ACTUALLY utilitarian or not. no conclusions were drawn.  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

we went to abc carpet and this carpet reached out and grabbed me. not mad. spring break goals 2015!  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

hello i will take one of everything, THANKS! also, i spy with my little eye my dad having the time of his life down in the mid left side. what a guy.

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a little stop in the station.   IMG_4857

we went to rockefeller center and my mom was fangirling over matt lauer so hard. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

also HEY empire state building. IMG_4690

what a good trip. thanks for gracing me with your presence mom and dad!

mom and dad do DC

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bill and kris came over for my spring break from the west coast. it snowed the day before they showed up (lol) so spring break was a term used lightly. here’s the thing about the east coast i am learning- the winter is slow to start, but then she is a professional at the “linger longer”. like, linger forever. she’s that awkward friend that doesn’t get social cues as when to leave your house because it is 12 am and you really want to shower and do your laundry, but she is still sitting on your couch. whatever, winter. whatever.

we went to the national botanic garden because i am weirdly obsessed with it…. but it is ok because evidently the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

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speaking of apples not falling far from the tree, billy ball and i could be twins.  Processed with VSCOcam with b5 preset

my mom was in teacher heaven.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

i took them to dinner at founding farmers where we ate everything. my dad, however, made it a point to tell me that he likes jiffy cornbread better than the stuff we cook up there. heresy. heresy!

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the next day i had to work, so they played tourist alone, and i just stole all their pictures.Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

why are they so weirdly small? i don’t know. and then we got pizza and gelato because DUH.Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

the following day we had a proper sunday brunch at farmers fishers bakers. we ate all the food and didn’t look back. my dad was super into the shrimp cocktail, mom was a fan of the french toast. i was a fan of coaching them through the process and telling them everything to eat. IMG_4641

one of my proudest moments during this trip was when my dad complimented my shoes. my shoes! he liked my docs and wanted some for himself, so we marched right up to the dr. martens store and he bought his own. twins!

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at the monuments, dads be shoppin, etc. IMG_0023

martin luther king jr. memorial realness.  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

i told her to sit on fdr’s lap, but she was afraid of the park rangers.Processed with VSCOcam with b5 preset

we went around georgetown, which, at this time of year, thankfully doesn’t smell like garbage and fish. silver linings! also,     Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

i was stoked to take my parents up to baked and wired, but this is how dad felt about waiting in line for a four dollar cupcake. unimpressed.

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i made them pretend to be having a good time. for posterity and stuff. IMG_4660

anyway, delightful times in dc. next stop, new york, new york.  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

lately

it’s been awhile. sorry, i’ve just been too busy getting good grades. (ha)

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discovered some good running spots here in this city. dc is usually known for it’s monuments but guys… its murals deserve an honorable mention at least.Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

every time i pass the supreme court i feel small. i think that’s the effect they were going for.  Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

cheesy love in bloomingdale. wouldn’t have it any other way. (unless these are my tax dollars at work, in which case i say there is not enough glitter)Processed with VSCOcam with b5 preset

girl talk. also FULL PANEL WINDOW.

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keeping vigilance over my bike. isn’t she a beaut?Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

big bear cafe is becoming my spot. do i order anything? nope never. do i unabashedly bask in their indie cool environment where every attendant is reading a vintage paperback, wearing a beanie and flannel, and pouring tea from a kettle that came straight from the west indies (or world market, same difference)? yep. yep. yep. (do i also feel real self conscious in my uggs? always)

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running on u street is a complete pain because you’ve got to dodge a lot of folks, yet i always find myself here. i also always wonder what TRUE REFORMER BUILDING actually means.

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taking my roommate out to lunch after she saved me from losing my wallet twice in three months. cava mezze grill is spicy and wonderful and the perfect way to counteract a pretty crappy day working at a psych hospital.

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walk to work through capitol hill on our SNOW DAY!  Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

my favorite part of the city; logan circle. it is so underrated. let’s keep it that way. also, this is post-haircut selfie time, where i am in limbo between shock and mania/euphoria. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

on saturday there was a snow-mergency and it was so funny. the streets were clear! i had anthropologie all to myself! everything closed early! i wore my invincible snow boots. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

pretty buildings on every corner of downtown. Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

the national geographic museum had an exhibit featuring food, so of course i went. this was the best photo. this is what my spirit looks like.

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coffee shop, USA. my friend just quit working here, so we had a celebratory cuppa (best hot chocolate on this planet, imo)

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if i was given an indispensable amount of time and an indispensable amount of dollars i would probably spend it thrifting and rifling through old adorable photos and postcards. taken right after i said something or did something that eliza probably deemed, “inappropriate”.  Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

snow-mergency peaceful sidewalks. (or not so peaceful. get outside and shovel your walk! imma bout to fall and break a hip!)Processed with VSCOcam with b1 preset

i got crafty this weekend instead of studying benzodiazepines and serotonin reuptake inhibitors.

my mantra for now and forever.

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freezing run around the national mall. listening to this podcast which is really good. (if you listen, let’s discuss children of the dirt)

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last week i got a free week subscription to blue apron from my friend who is a religious subscriber…. which was great and i loved. ingredients for delicious meals sent directly to your door! i’m all about it! this ramen was supposed to serve two, but when i got to my friend’s house and realized we actually needed to feed 6, a miracle happened. a true loaves and fishes situation!

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on sunday i didn’t have to work so we went to anacostia and fed homeless women and watched the oscars. i figured if i was going to waste at least four hours of my life watching pointless nothing, i might as well do some service beforehand to make myself feel better.

also, i’m mad birdman beat out boyhood, but i guess that is now just water under the bridge.

that’s all folks! here’s to spring’s quick approach and more green grass replacing bleak grey skies.

the short of it.

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i woke up and looked in the mirror.

it had to go. my hair.

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i scoured the internet for some inspiration, found a photo that seemed appropriate, and thanked the pinterest for being a thing. i pulled my unruly mane into a ponytail and thought this is the last time. 

parting is such sweet sorrow…. except when it isn’t. Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

if you live in the dc area, go ahead and call up immortal beloved.

now if only these damn bangs would grow out.

journal 52: valentine’s day

a list of everything i did on valentine’s day:

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset1. wake up at 8:34

2. check phone. blearily stumble through instagram, twitter, facebook, email, timehop, instagram (yes twice)

3. stumble out of bed and to bathroom. pee

3. eat leftover cold black beans and sweet potatoes out of the fridge. still hungry. make a green smoothie with a banana that has been sitting on the counter for 2 weeks. cover up the weird taste with a lot of frozen pineapple and spinach. still hungry. eat 1.5 frozen sunflower seed butter & dried cranberry balls that were created during an experiment. satisfied.

4. curl up on couch with computer. find tax documents. halfway fill out turbotax documents before losing interest.

5. move on to homework. a case study about depression! laugh at the irony.

6. chat with roommate in order to hash out the previous night’s events. nothing is left out. no stone is left unturned! every word of every conversation is examined and then cross examined, dissected, and slapped back together. it is now 11:30.

7.  decide to go running. pull on jacket and shoes. yes, you ran in your pajamas, but are they really considered pajamas if you also wear them to school, and they are actually just a pair of black leggings and nike socks? for a minute you consider becoming less of a slob, then reconsider.

8. leave house without gloves (bad idea). run around columbia heights dodging a lot of couples holding hands on 14th street and galentines dates in search of bottomless mimosas in which to drown their loneliness. there are literally rose petals littered all down the street. run exactly 4 miles of this debauchery before calling it good.

9. come home and shower. donuts on the counter! and bagels. tell yourself no and jump in the shower instead. wash your hair that hasn’t actually been washed for at least 8 days. you’re actually really proud of it. probably too proud. yeah you should probably bathe more. shave armpits. definitely don’t shave legs.

10. get dressed in front of your open window. you probably flash lots of people walking down the street, but whatever.

11. eat almonds while sauteeing kale and eggs. douse kale in soy sauce and eat it standing while talking to roommates about heaven knows what. still hungry. eat an apple. still hungry. eat another apple. still hungry. find yourself eating the exterior of a sesame seed bagel. like, skin the entire thing. become moderately disgusted with yourself.

12. put on your sleeping bag coat to go grocery shopping with your roommates. realize you’ve lost your wallet. hang your head in the shame that this is the 2nd time you’ve lost your wallet in two months. chalk this up as the best day ever. find a random credit card on dresser and activate it so you can buy food in the meantime.

13. traipse down the street with friends to roommate’s car, get inside, turn the key only to find that the battery is dead. groan in unison. call the only other person we know with a car to come and jump ours. get outside and pop the hood in the meantime as to act like we know what the hell is going on in there.

14. car gets jumped. we celebrate with a trader joe’s run. you buy a lot of things impulsively that seem like total luxuries and immediately regret it upon seeing the bill. mahi mahi burgers, soyrizo, a flat of strawberries, a million avocados, fancy hummus and spicy red pepper eggplant dip. (this will be a delicious week ahead.)

15. drive home as quickly as possible while scanning instagram. see a lot of couple on dates. so many selfies. so much handholding. so many descriptions filled with loving superlatives. this day is like visiting a zoo and watching the animals interract; kinda fun, kinda depressing, mostly weird. if you’re lucky, you can even witness them feeding each other.

16. run inside to put away perishables before work. throw on uniform and some semblance of makeup, just in case some attractive single male stumbles into the restaurant, we lock eyes, and just KNOW. put on bronzer because you fancy.

17. zip up sleeping bag coat, scarf, gloves. definitely don’t forget the gloves. ride through the ice wind to work with sharon van etten on full blast, crooning pessimism and heartbreak. you run a lot of stoplights and probably get honked at two or three times. you live for this!

18. get to work marginally late, but sneak in before anybody notices.

19. spend the evening balancing really hot plates of pot roast, filets, cedar plank salmon, and chicken and waffles on your arms. get a lot of couples to go bags. there’s a lot of hand holding. eat one million french fries right out of the fryer. eat a meatless meatloaf with vegan mashed potatoes that was abandoned by somebody at sometime during the night. sweat a lot in the kitchen. give booze recommendations. watch the blizzard outside. wonder if anyone would miss an entire red velvet cake if accidentally “vanished”.

20. finish work, punch out, and suit up for the arctic ride ahead. dump the snow out of your helmet and scrape the ice off the seat. gingerly ride home, ice wind almost knocking you over a few times. pass a lot of drunken lovebirds in dupont leaning on each other in order to make it safely through the cross walk. ride faster than you’ve probably ever ridden. it is now 1 am.

21. stumble inside, rip off clothes to defrost. curl up in bed despite the smell of food that clings to every strand of hair. see what gems social media is willing to offer up. chuckle at the absurdity and relish in the heater blowing directly in your face. fall asleep. you have single-handedly handled the day.

pun intended.